Leaning Into Discomfort

hello darlings,

Moving to Portland has been a lesson in discomfort. I left my home of 20+ years, my daughter, my friends, my career, all my favorite haunts, and the streets that I know like the back of my hand. It’s a wonderful and exhilarating feeling to leave everything behind, shrouded with a dose of melancholy. What have I done?

I don’t regret moving in the least. I needed to shake things up and experience growth in a way that I don’t think I have ever done before. I’ve actually never chosen a city to live in before. I’ve moved places because of boyfriends and best friends. I stayed in Seattle because I wanted my daughter to have one contiguous childhood experience from K-12 (and then also college).

But Portland? I chose to move here without obligations. It was a place that felt safe and known to me. And it is – I already have wonderful friends and family here! But doing new things is sometimes hard and uncomfortable and humanizing. When you start over, your life automatically becomes a little smaller before it expands again. You sometimes lose your bearings, but I am leaning into the quiet void to figure it out. I’ve embraced it.

Without as many social distractions, I’ve diverted more time to personal growth. Going through the exercises in Maybe It’s You has been pretty illuminating. The book asks you to design your life in 12 key areas, and guess what? Writing down the qualities of your aspirational life is actually quite hard. You really got to get vulnerable with yourself – which is harder than you think. And then rating your current life against your aspirational life? Totally humbling. Think about it. How many things in your life are you doing that support your dream life? Yikes, right?

The great news is is that I am getting there. Slowly, I’m getting there and the world will expand once more.

Photo by Kyle Glenn on Unsplash

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giyen kim

Hey there, welcome! This blog is my journal, writing space and where I share the things I want other people to know about. Right now I'm posting everyday. Whoa.

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